Monday, June 20, 2011

Counting Down

There are 4 days until my birthday.  I don't know why I am even sharing this.  I usually don't get all hyped up about it.  I can't even remember when it meant anything.  Perhaps it is because more than anything I want to be surprised, in a good way, but know that it won't happen and ultimately just want to get it over with.  I've already shared what I would like (Read the Time Flies post from a couple of days ago), but while I am in this funk of a mood and feeling overwhelmingly morose, I think I will just type things out. (Which I am doing more for therapy than to really impart any profoundly substantial information - but hey, this is my blog so I can do what I want!) 

While listening to Pandora today at work (one of my secret joys - who says you can't crunch data and jam at the same time?!) Alanis Morisette's All I Really Want came on.  (Little Mandy tidbit #1 - I love the album Jagged Little Pill.)  I found myself remembering a lot of things, but mostly, truly listening to the words.  I am sure there were times when I was younger that I did just that, but for some reason, today, they really hit home.  Seriously, who doesn't find the lyrics "intellectual intercourse" utterly profound.  I would LOVE to have a conversation with someone, anyone, (preferably my husband) that went deep enough to really make one think.  Alas, each person has something they give up in life; one of mine is conversation.

I recently treated myself to the Essential Collection by Diana Palmer ($6.95 off of eBay - not bad for 7 books I suppose!) and have been enjoying these books.  It is kind of humorous to me though, how romance novels were written 20+ years ago (which these were).  So much has changed between the contemporary of then and the contemporary of now.  In some ways it is endearing, in other's it is comical! Anyhow, there isn't really a point to this other than I am on book 3 of the 7 book series.  (Note: these are all reprints of the original Long, Tall Texan series from the late 80's.)

Back to my melancholy demeanor.  Have you ever been in a funk so bad that you longed to have a prescription to get you out of it?  I can usually read Ecclesiastes and be all good, but this time it runs a wee bit deeper.  (Little Mandy tidbit #2 - the book of Ecclesiastes is my favorite book of the Bible) Perhaps it is the longing for things that will never be?  Who knows, but there will be a time, soon, that it will go away; it always does, then I'm good for a while.  Don't know why I put all this here, except to get it off my shoulders.  (They weren't built for bearing such heavy loads!) At least now I know why the character Eeyore was created - adults needed a make believe character to associate with, or perhaps it was so kids could have a glimpse of what feelings look like when they have full outward manifestation...yeah, either way you get where I am going with this.

Well, it is 7pm, everyone is asleep, must have been the long day of sitting in front of the TV or playing the Wii, except for Kelly.  (She is actually still outside playing.)  Oh, sometimes, to be young again and to know what I know now.  Yep, those are the things that stories are made of.  Perhaps I should write one?!

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