2017 - A Look Back

I woke up to an empty house this morning.  The Mr. had to work - a special shout out to all the public service personnel who don't get holidays off, you are revered more than you know - at least in our household. All of our Littles spent New Year's Eve with their other parents, I'm sure they are all going to be joyously sleep deprived when they get home this afternoon.  That leaves me and the dog chilling on the couch, surrounded by the beautiful silence that comes from a still home. I thoroughly enjoy these hours, the ones where I can have time in the Word and then time in reflection and thought. (I try to wake up early each morning for this reason alone.)

I'm reading in Psalms right now.  I cannot begin to tell you how much I love where I am in the Bible.  It is like each word is speaking directly to my heart and current situation.  One of the things I do when I read is write in the margins what I am praying about, what I hear the Lord speaking to me on, and my gratitude to Him for being exactly who He repeatedly tells me He is.  In all ways He is constant; He is faithful; and He is mine.  Though I change, He never does.  And that is the basis for this post.  I came across one of the things I penned in the margin of my Bible.  I cannot tell you what day/year (sometime between my birthday in 2013 - when I got the Bible I currently read out of regularly - and today) I wrote it, but I can tell by the words what I was feeling when I did.

The blessing, however, is that I can say 2017 was not wrought with that single pain or affliction.  Not one day.  Because it was an answered prayer. It was a victory only the Holy Spirit could have brought because there was no way, not an ounce of energy enough in me that could have allowed me to do it on my own.  So, what did I do today?  Well I added into that margin (with today's date of course) the outcome of that prayer.  1 year and 64 days sober. Not a drop. And no desire for one. But that got me thinking, despite all the heartache and hard lessons 2017 did bring, what other benefits did it bring?   What other ways did God show up?  Because He did - He always shows up.

Below is a list of ways last year was a good year. There is no particular order and if there was to be a weighted scale, I'd have to say they are all perfectly equal.

• The diagnosis and subsequent surgery on my knee was better than I had hoped for and after 6 months my knee is as strong as I ever remember it being (now I have to get back to running!)
• I celebrated one year at my current job - after nearly 20 years with my previous employer and it being a dynamically different industry this was a painful year of growth, but God answered my daily prayers.  He didn't let me down.  I have had the best months of my professional career, to date.
• I applied for, interviewed a couple times with various ranking individuals, and have been offered an opportunity to present a teaching demonstration to the Regional Dean of a local Christian University.  It has been a tediously long process and we have still to work out a time that works for us both, but I believe God will put it before me again when the time is right.  He got me this far.
• I have written ~ 12,000 words in my book. I'm still a far cry from a completed first draft, but when the Lord puts the idea and words on my heart, the fingers they go a-flyin'!  I've no doubt He's still teaching me a few things that will need entered into text.  (I know a lot of it has to do with Him getting me away from all the feelings - to carve out the truth and fact - hehehe! It is a nonfiction book, BTW.)
• We got to take a family weekend trip to Indy - The Children's Museum and The Museum of Art.  It was a weekend full of laughter and love.  I truly enjoy the family God gave me.
• My Mr. and I celebrated year #2 of marriage.  I cannot put into words enough how thankful I am the Lord brought him into my life.  He was an answer to prayer and is my best friend.  Although I am sure there are some days he'd prefer I didn't tell him everything! HA! In case you didn't know, I'm a talker....
• God revealed to me the truth of church and His Church - then my role within it. He did this in a painful personal growth process, but I get it.  It was one of those complete aha moments that took me by surprise and one that I really wish I had learnt earlier in my walk, but I don't believe anything is on accident - timing wise.  
• We have been at our new home church for almost two years.  These people are our friends, our sisters and brothers in Christ.  These people are who we (I) gladly worship next to - because where two or three gather, there He is.  And, oh, He is so there!
• I got the opportunity to get creative (we both did, actually) with creating margin and making ends meet.  Better yet, we got to do so with jobs that expressed the little things we enjoy most.  This opportunity provided beyond what we thought it would in the beginning.  Not just the financial resources, but the lessons we got to teach our Littles on being good and wise stewards and being mindful of how you manage your resources.
• I started a financial blog.  I've been a bit lax with it as of late, posting wise, but have quite a bit in my notebook. Perhaps I'll give it a more serious push this year.
• God has grown relationships - shown where personalities can be unique and still be compatible.  He has answered, abundantly, the prayer to make peace and friendship the center, because simply being related doesn't make it so.
• We had an unimaginably wonderful Christmas due to the kindness and thoughtfulness of a friend.  Her love and big heart did something for our Littles I could not even begin to know how to pay back.  She opened the door for God's people and their love to shine through and rain love on them.  It may be a small gesture to some, but it was infinitely huge to us.  I truly believe it will be a Christmas they always remember.
• The Mr. and I got the opportunity to give a portion of our testimony at church. We recorded an hour-long session with the pastor, and the tech guy worked some amazing magic to pare it down to 15 or so minutes.  Shortened yes, but on point, it was!   Just 10 days ago (a couple months after it was shown to the church) we where informed of the outcome of that testimony.  You guys - God.  And only Him.  That is all I can say.  
• My Littles.  All five of these beautiful little souls I have the honor of growing. They have so much thrown at them in this world of ours, that it makes the little bit of time I (we) get that much more important.  I know I don't have all the answers, but I know what I know.  God made me, me and them, them and He gave us to each other for a reason.  It was a year of growth in many, many ways and it was never one sided.
• Last, but not least, I have been a student.  Not in a formal sense, but of life in general.  I have been given the lesson of having no control and not even an iota of understanding on how to work the outcome.  I believe I can say I have come to the end of myself.  It may sound cliche, but when I did, I found God was already there - waiting. I have no clue what this coming year will hold, but I do know He holds it.  I know that all I want, more than anything, is for Him to search me then fix/grow me and to lead me where He wants me to go.  I know that while I may not get what I want, I will always get what I need.  And where all of that comes together, I hope I get the opportunity to use it to teach another of His goodness and glory.

Here's to this year and all the opportunities it holds to do what I love to do - write and teach others.

Happy New Year!

- M