It seems more and more things are happening that make life, well, just awful. They are things like: not getting picked for something, not being included, working really hard on something only to have it fail, losing a job, a friend, a loved one, and the worst thing, not knowing how to help someone who has had one of these things happen to them. This has been a bad week. Truthfully, it makes me want to scream at the top of my lungs, from the tallest peak, GOD WHY? WHY? Why is this happening and what can I do about it? Please don't misunderstand me, this isn't about me, this is about those I can't help. This is about my abject smallness compared to the bigness of what's the matter. It's the fact that it can't be undone. It's the constant wanting to make it all better, yet not having a clue as to where to start. It's about seeing people you care about hurting, deeply, and wanting their pain to go away. It's about wishing I could do more for them - for THEM.
What do I do? It's so unfair. The pain, the agony, the cruelty of life. It's the longing for one more day seeing them happy, knowing their hearts are at peace. Sure, everything has a reason, but in the thick of it, that is never enough. Never. My heart hurts for them. I want to hug them and cry with them and let them know I'm here. But then...
I remember, have I been? In all honesty, truly been? Have I been there when it was sunshine and rainbows? That's it, the crux of the matter - NO, regretfully, not a lick. So what can be done now? Simply, hope and pray. Pray for their healing, pray for their comfort, pray they find joy. Then be there to share in the pain, share in the sorrow, share in the difficulty - if and when they want it, because truthfully some things should never be handled alone. That's what friends are for.
But, there's a fine line between being an acquaintance and being a friend. That line is defined simply as, time. The time spent together. The time taken to really be involved. The self sacrifice to be there for that person when they need you. That is what it takes. It isn't superficial, it isn't a status, it's a greater caring and desire that their life be as full as it can be. It's being honest, to a fault, and loving no matter what. That is the picture of friendship and then, when life isn't fair, you have each other, more than just in thought, but also in deed.