Anticipation

A few years back (2008) Chris Arnall created a mathematical formula "proving" that June 20th holds the trophy for being the happiest day of the year.  In fact, here is a quippit from the article that was ran in The Telegraph.

"Apparently the feeling of optimism caused by the combination of lighter evenings, the prospect of holidays and memories of childhood summers is at its peak on June 20.
According to the research this has been worked out using the equation O + (N xS) + Cpm/T + He.
O stands for being outdoors and outdoor activity, N is connection with nature, which is in full bloom now, S is socialisation with neighbours and friends, Cpm stands for childhood positive memories, T is the mean temperature which is now usually warm, and He is holiday expected." - Rebecca Smith 

I chuckled when I read that.  See, I don't think he took into account personal experience for this equation.  Sure, it is just for fun and is in no way scientifically valid, but hey, let's run with it. I have to say that the week that contains June 24th is the worst week of the year. The reason, anticipation. 

Each year, I get the joy of knowing I will celebrate another birthday (Lord willing) and each year I tell myself that I am not going to get excited, or anxious, for something special.  However, each year I let myself down.  Why? Because each year I secretly think it will be a better year and I will have the pleasure of being surprised.  Surprised, not so much with a party or a mountain of gifts, I am after all no longer a child, but with the joy of having the day be special.  It isn't, really.  It is just another day; it means no more than any other.  It's rather depressing, really.  Perhaps that is why I spend the week leading up to it fully depressed.  Perhaps my expectations are too high.  Yeah, that must be it.

So, as I sit here thinking about all the things that won't happen for my "special" day this year I tap away at the one thing that does make my heart a bit happier.  I can't change what it is.  I mean, only death will prevent the day from coming.  Well, at least for me.  So what to do?  I think I will just take the kiddos and make the day special for them.  After all, birthdays really are for kids.


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