I Read Too Much

Why do today, what you can put off until tomorrow?  Or wait, isn't it why put off until tomorrow what can be done today?  Oh, I always get it mixed up, but I do know one thing, procrastination always happens when life comes first.  Here is why: kids.  They don't care that you have homework or even an exam to take.  No, they still need fed, taken care of, time spent with,  or in other words, bonding.  So, what is the one thing that gets pushed aside?  Exactly, it isn't just one thing, it is many things, and for me that is anything that takes time away from them.  After all, it wasn't their choice that I went back to college as an adult.  Nope, no sirree, it was my desire to stay employed that did that.  Regardless, I have found that I've become the world's worst procrastinator and in all honesty I can't rightly blame it all on them, as easy as that would be. Now, I'm sure if getting this degree was something I really want...

Have you ever woke up on the wrong side of the bed, and I don't mean geographically?  Today, I did.  I don't know what it was, perhaps it was the way the previous day ended, or that the new alarm clocks we just had to have don't work in the simplest manner, or perhaps because my toddler decided that she needed to crawl into bed with me halfway through the night thus destroying any chance at sleep I was going to get.  Whichever of the aforementioned it was, or wasn't, I am snarky.  Yes, this isn't a wildly recognized word, in fact it is one I only recently learned, but sakes alive it certainly has the character and unique enough sense to truly describe my attitude. Have you also noticed that on those exceptionally snarky days others tend to reach out to you more?  By this, I mean, every one and their cousin decides that it is the day they just have to text, email, call, IM, or otherwise contact you.  These are the days when a person can...

I realize that my title is by far childish, in fact it is down right rediculous, but it was the nicest thing I could say to express the way I feel.  When a child is small, typically around toddlerhood, grown-ups think it is great fun to teach them car sounds.  Perhaps it is more because saying vrroom, vrroom and beep beep are fun to say and the child presents an excuse.  Regardless, it happens.  So there we adults are, training generations on the first basics of car vernacular.  Why is this so significant?  Well, there comes a time, roughly 14-15 years after those first utterings that said child will get behind the wheel of a car; heaven forbid!  Honestly, I now fully realize how my parents felt X number of years ago when I first started to drive.  However, that is another topic for another time.  I'm making a different point tonight. Now enter this scenario:  It is raining, heavily.  There are 2 lanes on the exit ramp w...

Several years ago, circa late 1997/early 1998, I went on a group "date" with a bunch of friends and we watched a scary-ish movie with a song in it which lyrics stated "time is on my side, yes it is."  I can't help but to think, that though the memories of that evening are greatly shadowed and the people I shared it with are vastly dispersed from my life right now, that there was some truth in the matter.  I know this probably seems like a form of psycho babble, but work with me here. Time has a way of being on our side.  No, really.  I know that it flies and it is something no matter how hard you try you will never get back, but it is those moments you are given that are truly yours; they are essentially on your side.  For instance, this weekend, the sum of 48 hours, in no way held the adventure, the lure, the promise, of great memories being made, but it held in it time spent in my home, with my family, doing what families do. What does that picture look li...

Today was a difficult day.  My little girl had to have emergency surgery.  Well, the doctor's called it that.  I didn't see how they thought it was much of an emergency seeing as how it took almost 42 hours from the moment the doctor said it had to happen that it did, but emergency none-the-less.  Now, that said, and for those who know me, I was going crazy.  Me, the natural fixer of all things; the person that always needs to help someone find the answer or direct their path, etc, etc.  I couldn't "fix" what was the matter, per se.  There I was the person she needed the most to help her and I had to let her go.  Allow me to start at the beginning. This past weekend baby girl got sick, really sick.  Due to this "cold" (for lack of better terms) her tonsils and adenoids swelled up to such a large size (they were on a bigger size to begin with - but not causing her any issues with eating, sleeping, breathing, well functioning in general)...

Have you ever been disappointed?  I mean truly, unequivocally, disappointed? When this happens is it the result of another person?  Or perhaps it was due to some preconceived notion or plan you had developed that didn't pan out the way you thought it would?  Sure you have.  In fact, I knew the answer to this even before I made the words come together on this page.  You know what I don't know though, is how you get through it.  That is the million dollar question today.  It isn't so much that I am looking to write a book and I am seeking ways to fill it, but that I wonder if there are others who suffer from the wrong way to process the disappointment. You see, when disappointed the first thing I want to do, yes even as a thirty-something I still do this, is throw a temper tantrum.  For some reason, the inner toddler in me wants to come out and be heard.  After all, there is something that is not right in my environment and I do not know how ...

There are days when the best thing that can happen is that nothing happens at all.  Well, almost nothing.  These are the days that are started and ended with out hick-ups; the ones that flow solely because they have a routine.  I like that word - routine.  It is a comforting sort of word.  One that implies there will be no surprises and you can bank on what will occur.  For instance today - get up, go to work, go to class, pick up the kids, check school papers, ensure kids are showered, teeth are brushed, and they are snuggled into bed.  These routine items rarely change, at least for this semester.  I am sure the next one will create a new series of events that will define our way of life.  It is quite funny, not the ha-ha kind, but funny none-the-less how the simplicity of a daily task can make a chaotic, harrowing event pale in comparison.  Perhaps not in the moment, but in the larger scheme of things that event is but a b...

OK, so I started typing today with one point to make and realized that you can't force a subject.  True writing will flow when there are meant to be words on paper, or in this case letters in space.  When it comes down to it, I just have a list of random thoughts going through my head.  Perhaps a bir of my randomness will become a conversation starter for one of you out there, or perhaps not. 1) Wishing to be something doesn't always bring it to fruition. 2) Time is not relative, it moves regardless of who you are or what you are doing. 3) Submersion in anything will not make you an authority. 4) The answers aren't always in the back of the book. 5) People come and people go, what matters is that you remain the same. 6) Friends are those people who know the real you and still call to say "hi". 7) People can never be a replacement for God. 8) Heartbreak follows the former when you don't realize its truth. 9) Reading just the headlines will not give yo...

OK, so I am moving a little slow through James.  Well, it is has more to do with my inconsistency of devotional time.  I reread James 4 this morning, more from forgetting where I left off rather than the desire to reread it, but boy am I glad I did, since last time (being a couple of days ago) I totally missed this section. Perhaps God is talking to me after all.   How many times have you been tempted to think to yourself or whisper to another something negative about yet another person?  Now, now, don't sit there and try to say you've never done such a thing.  You are human; therefore, it has happened.  How do I know?  Because I have done the same thing!  Ah-GASP!  Don't be shocked, as I have probably shared the thoughts with one of you, or vice versa! Here is what I read, rather reread, this morning, but actually understood or grasped as if for the first time.  (I love how God does that by the way; showing you something a...