I Read Too Much

It's been said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different result.  I need to be honest here.  I doubt my ability to teach.  But more than that, I doubt it is a dream that will ever come true. Hear me out on this. In the past few days, life has had its way with me.  It has been one curve ball after another and one anxiety-laden situation after another. I have shed many tears, questioned my existence and purpose, and even thought, in many ways, how I wish I was someone else.  Granted, the latter would not have prevented the former from happening; it would have just changed the situation.  I digress. In the past, I have shared about spiritual gifts.  I have even been so bold as to share what mine are. In the past year, I have run a million miles per hour headlong into achieving my gifts, of doing or becoming what they say of me. I've failed to succeed. In that failure, I have gained an extreme level of doubt over the truth

If I were to ask you right this second to grab a mirror and take a long, hard look at yourself what is the first thing you would see?  Be honest here. I'm not asking you to reply to this post with your answer.  Look again.  What do you see now?  If you are anything like me you noticed the imperfection(s) straight away, whether they are actual or perceived.  It's alright, I'm just the disembodied voice on the other side of this computer, I can't see you.  But you want to know what I'd really see?  Beauty.  I'd see the gift God made you to be.  I'd see the beauty that was uniquely bestowed upon you by a Creator that doesn't make mistakes.  I can do that.  I have no problems seeing in others what I cannot see in myself. In fact, the first thing I see when I look in the mirror is my scar.  I have one.  Its right there in the center of my forehead begging to be noticed and laughed at.  Truly, no one sees it straight off, but I do.  It's the unfortunate

This past Thursday we celebrated Thanksgiving with my family at my mom's house.  There is just something altogether magical about the day. OK, I admit, magical is not the word to use; perhaps special is a much better choice.  I love Thanksgiving.  Lets start there. Thanksgiving is so many things to so many people.  To me, it is a day that holds no pretense.  What does this mean, you ask.  Simply, it means that the day is filled with no expectations.  No expectations of what did the gift cost, does my hair look the best, is my outfit going to meet approval, will I say the right thing, will I do the right thing, am I loved?  No, Thanksgiving is that day when you shed all those expectations and reflect on the fact that; you had the money to buy the gift in the first place, you haven't had to fight a cancer that robbed you of your hair, you have the opportunity to be clothed completely, you get to spend time in conversation with others who won't judge you unwarranted, but rat