I Read Too Much

Sleep...the one thing that, just a few years baack, I would have said: "I will sleep when I die" and firmly meant it.  Now, well, lets just say, more and more each day I find myslef further and further behind on the one thing I want more of than love.  I know, it is quite strange what a a couple of years into the third decasde of life will do for one's perspective.  Perhaps it is the burning of a candle at both ends, but in all honesty, am I? I have completed the series of classes that I was taking, half-heartedly, on Wednesdays due to a grant that we received through Work One.  I do not think there is one thing I can actively recall from a single one of the classes.  Then there is there is my Bachelor's Degree that I am attempting to complete ( I will admit the Associate's was much much easier to obtain.), and now the Industrial Maintenance Tech Certification I am working on, from yet another grant through the state.  Yes I like to learn - we should all ...

Ok, so I'm overweight, much the same way Walmart is a Chinese Warehouse...thats a gross understatement.  There are few things in my life I am not proud of, my current health is one of them.  Now don't get me wrong, I do look much as I do in the photo I have posted, but put another 35 pounds on me and you will be about right; afterall, a lady never reveals her dress size.  We are starting a new challenge at work on Monday, one I desperately need.  I have attempted to begin a health/workout routine here at home, but alas, the discipline is just not there.  You know it is hard to unlearn bad habits.  My biggest one...reading.   Ok, well the act of reading isn't bad.  In fact, it is a great thing.  However, what is bad is the fact that I will spend almost every shred of free time I have reading a book.  I keep telling myself this wouldn't be an issue if I could just get my husband to by me a stationary bike...yeah, he isn't falling for ...

Or at least that is what I hear.  Today has been a cacophony of thoughts rattling around in my head.  Actually it all started last Friday.  Well, that too, may be a misinterpretation of the time tables. You see, last Friday I had the opportunity to be a part of a very important phone call; one in which, my professional career was all but laid open for all to see.  Again, that too, is a stretch, there were only four on the line and I was one of them.  However, the point I am making is that, in that time, I was presented the opportunity to take a new found passion, combine it with one that I discovered years ago, and make money doing it, all at once.  Now that said, no, I didn't get a new job, yes and no.  I'm still with the same company, just that the roles that I will hold will be flexible in predetermined intervals.  For this I am wicked excited and beyond words to explain. Then...there was this week.  It is amazing how a follow-up convers...

This is the name of my blog, well, actually it is I Read Too Much, but to get here you have to type in ...italltakestime... and well, frankly, it does.  I woke up this morning a bit after 7am.  It felt so good to sleep in.  Then I read a book, goofed around on the Internet, watched two saved TV programs, cleaned the kitchen, cooked dinner, watched a 2.5 hour class and did homework.  Now, I'm sitting here still at my computer wondering where the day went.  That list, in my mind, in no way justifies the loss of 15 hours, yet it is.  You know, a funny thing about time, we are all given 24 hours of it each day and yet no two of us uses it the same way.  All of our 24 hours are as unique as we are.  Kind of makes you really think; well, it does for me at least.  Then I got to thinking about the way time is manipulated.  For instance, tonight we are to move our clocks forward an hour in the observance of Daylight Savings Time.  Seriousl...

A while back, I think sometime around Christmas of last year, OK so not that far back, I started getting, ummm, what is the word....morose, that's it.  It was such an overwhelming feeling, which, I suppose the word itself indicates.  I was yearning for, searching for, a way to speak out, to reach out, to share.  For those that know me, I talk, not just a little, but a lot; sometimes I actually have something to say.  Anyway, to my point, in this quest, I stumbled across a scrap booking forum.  I guess I should stop here because even in the seemingly random randomness of life, God is directing paths, in reflection, this was one of those times.  Like, I said I was directed to this scrap booking forum, where I created a profile, then diligently waited day after day for someone to say something to me, about me, yadda, yadda, yadda.  Guess what?  NADDA!  Exactly, I know, right?!  However, true that is in that regard, it isn't true in ano...

So tonight at church the message was on testimonies and how they are a critical part of a Christian's life.  Pastor had 10 passages that he referenced showing the various ways in which testimonies played part in the Bible.  I wrote down, OK, so maybe not wrote, more like swyped, the passages into the mini diary section of my phone (man I love technology); well until I exceeded the 1000 character limit I did. Psalm 107:2 - "...let the redeemed of the Lord say this..." Testimonies are vital to our walk with God. Psalm 66:16 - "...let me tell you what he has done for me..." Mark 5:19-20 - "...the man went away and began to tell...and all the people were amazed..." our testimony is to point upward not inward our testimony should be fresh and up to date and be about our salvation John 7:7 - "...because I testify..." God can use my testimony to convict a person We ought to proclaim the light Acts 14:3 - "...speaking boldly for the L...

Kind of a bland title, I know.  However, that is the question; when.  For instance: When will I understand my class? When will I be comfortable with the skin I am in? When will I have the confidence to go after the job I'd like to apply for? When will I know if my decisions are right? When will I know what God's will is for my life? WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN...IT ALL TAKES TIME! It all gets to be pretty circular and never ending.  For instance do I have so many "when" questions simply because I do not know the true meaning of happiness?  I know that these questions are all vaguely familiar, in fact I believe I just talked about each of them in my last post.  Guess I have come to the resolution that I thought that I had. My mind hates me.  No, seriously, hear me out.  It hates me due to the fact that I twist it and contort its thougths until I work it into mental oblivion.  Scary isn't it?  Try being in my head for a day, you would re...

Why does something always look and feel monstrously large when there isn't a way to firmly grab a h old of it?  Does the simple fact that it is so big instantly mean that there is no faith in the beholder?  Does the "giant" indicate the person is simply not strong, not smart, not destined, not something that would be the defeating answer?  This is where I am.  I am facing a giant.  Perhaps this giant is big because I am distorting the facts of it, but perhaps it is because I am repeatedly being presented with it.  Here it is: my degree - I'm struggling here man.  Am I struggling because I'm not smart enough for it, because it isn't a passion of mine, because I don't give it more time, because it isn't what God wants for my life?  Or is it more simply because I am too lazy to become the smartest person in the classes, to make it a passion, to give it time, or to realize it is God's will for my life?  Seems too circular for my taste. I know...