I Read Too Much

Let's get a little deep, shall we?  This past Sunday, guess that was just yesterday, we had a wonderful service at church.  First there was the Sunday School lesson.  I'm not going to lie to you, I absolutely LOVE my Sunday School.  I don't know if it is the lessons we learn, the conversation, or all of the people in my class.  Honestly, I think it is all, because all those things together have grown us all together.  I truly find myself without words when I think of the blessing this class has been to my life.  However, that isn't the point to this, well, mostly. You see, I have a very bitter heart from time to time.  My heart will think the worst of people.  It will fabricate the meanest of thoughts and unspoken words.  My heart scares me sometimes.  I'm quite certain from this utterance you have all counted me as being a vile person and are now forming labels to put on me.  That's ok if you are, this is something that is c...

Today at work we were all rehashing "the glory days."  You know, those days where earning the varsity letter, hanging out with your friends, perhaps having a part time job, and counting the days until graduation where all there was to live for.  In my office we have some pretty good "used to be" stories.  It's actually quite impressive, but alas, we are all in an office doing our bit to make a company run instead of out making millions with the skills from our "used to be's."  I got to thinking, I know, a terrible habit of mine!, about last summer and the summer before that, you know, when I used to be a runner.  I have had one injury after the next, all with my knees, and the verdict is overuse.  So, I used to be... I'm going to be honest, not being where I was physically weighs on me.  It tears me apart mentally and emotionally.  Why?  Because in my mind's eye, I used to be pretty good.  I used to get on myself for not running a...

It has been a quite some time since I have shared a post in which I spoke of my grandma.  However, today, I am missing her like crazy.  Actually it has only been in the last few hours where I've missed her so much it hurts.  You see, a lot of women have moms where they can go and talk to them about everything, where they can seek advice, tell them about their day, and all those other joys.  If not a mom, then well an aunt or woman of sorts.  Me, I had my grandma.  In some ways my grandma was like a mom to me, well, in a lot of ways, but mostly because she just was there for me.  I could talk to her about absolutely anything and she didn't try to fix it, correct, berate me, one up me, belittle me, hurt me, chastise me, or turn it into something about her by cutting me off mid sentence.  My grandma was the best.  In the last couple years of her life her memory wasn't the best, and with that came some moments when talking with her were more di...